Party dumbasses

Ok, ok, ok....

I am no friend of these "what you should do"-lists but here is mine...

Continuing my post regarding the "party people" I have to do this list...
I like to have fun at the club...but there are a few guys and girls, that really seem to have graduated in ruining other peoples party. That does annoy me and this is, why I do the list...

Answers to the question: How to avoid ruining the party of others...

1.) Boys & girls: If you are standing at the bar and want something to drink... Wait for your turn. Others are thirsty too, and when you show up, don't expect to be the first one served.

2.) Girls: If you have to wear a neckline to the navel, don't be upset when "we" men are ogling you. You made yourself look sharp so bear our looks. If you want us to look away, wear Birkenstocks, wide old pants and show no skin...

3.) Boys & girls: If you are not going to dance...Get the f*** off the dancefloor! You think it is fun out there... ok then, just watch it form the outside and don't stand in the way of those, who want to move their bodies. It is just so impoliote to take the space on the dancefloor like a rock in the sea, without leaving space for those who want to move...

4.) Boys & girls: If you wanna break glass, go home and smash your own windows, but do not throw your glasses or bottles on the floor. Think of all the pretty girls that have only stilettos on or the breakdancers. If they slip or put their hands to the ground they gonna be hurt severely...

5.) Boys: If you wanna clobber yourself with some rivals, go the f***ing somewhere else.
We are here to dance and partty and not for watching or receiving severe violence...
And think of it: Alcochol is no excuse for being a brutal asshole...

6.) Boys and girls: If you want to drink a cocktail, sit at a table or at the bar.
Don't go to the dancefloor and spill that stuff on other peoples clothes...

7.) Girls: If you are not going to dance with me.., .do not look at me as if I were a stupid grandpa who didn't find his way home and laugh about the fact, that I like dancing. I may not be as flexible as Beyoncé and may not be as skilled as Fred Astaire, but I enjoy it, and what do you have to complain about it...? And if you do not get your asses movin' and just stand outside the dancefloor to slander about all the people in the pit, go home and switch on the TV... This is party-zone and everybody is entitled to dance and party like we want it...

8.) Boys & girls: If you like to vomit on the floor, go to the pigstall to do so and do not use the club as your personal rest room. Other people are here and they do not like the odor of Jack Daniels flavored pavement pizza...

9.) Light jockeys: Stop suffocating us with the fog from the steam machines.
When we like to dance, we also like to breathe and steaming the whole room, doesn't make the music sound better...

10.) DJs: If you like to yell at a crowd, go to speakers corner in London, but stop tryin' to get our mood up with drunkly yelling to the music. We want to hear the music, not your badly mixed disturbing voice... GOT IT?

11.) Boys & girls: If you like to migrate, do not use the dancefloor as crossing platform, especially, when everyone is dancin'...It is so annoying when you want to dance and someone just rambles into your back that wants to get to the other end of the room... There is enough space 'round the dancefloor... use these spaces for your move...

12.) DJs: Do the "flow" in you music! If you push us up with some good rythm, do not brake us down with some slow shit, only because its popular... Keep us happy by acknowledging the dancers soul... it is not you, it is us who dance...so select the music, that stay equal in its tempo and character and do not put us "in the mix" of tempi and emotions... that ruins every party...

Ok, then and all in all, treat everyone with respect, even the gorgeous looking girls or the old party animals like me...

Now... let's have a party to nite...!